AaRLs Weekly Rant - Episode 001

Welcome to the first segment of this weekly column. I had many topics planned this week, but for me one stood out more. So on with the show... Im sure weve all done it. In the dark, alone, in front of a crowd, even with our parents or complete strangers in the room... yes Im talking about "Arguing Through Texting". Whatever the kids call it these days, I have no idea, but it happened to me this week. Theres nothing like receiving a text full of hateful, over the top or shortened, misspelled words that are completely CAPITALIZED! Now I love arguing, but I prefer it face to face. But sitting behind the keyboard/cell phone. Certain peoples seem to think they are a "Word God".

A long story short. Me and this friend, who is college educated of course. (Im not and therefore stupid in todays world. Yet she makes 11 bucks an hour and is 25K in debt to my 30 bucks an hour and zero debt. Go figure. Not the point here.) She thinks she smart and she loves texting. She rather text you across the table then talk to your face. Add dropping those college level word bombs that you need a fucking dictionary to figure out. And then add a warhead of a missing letter here and switched letters there that completely change the words meaning and purpose. (In fact, I think she does it on purpose) Yet face to face, she completely fails. She cant find those word bombs which become duds. All those fancy words that she can spell on a dime (mostly) from a keyboard fail her in face time. The art of face time is LOST! Basically, what Im saying is that she cant carry on a conversation at all, at least an in depth one, but from behind a cell/keyboard. Shes gold. (Or at least shiny silver)

Im straying from the point though... Imagine your waiting for the train or at work already. Pissed off from being late or the boss being a prick. Now you get an incoming text from that special bitch of a person. On their high text horse, dropping word bombs that contain 4/5 syllables for 4/5 words in a row. Describing a situation like writing a novel... in a text. Having to wade through those big college words trying to figure out what the fuck she is talking about. ((She is the kind of person that would send 100+ words describing a circle!!) (Go try that one yourself!)) And oh yeah, go make them letters BIG! Theres been times where I stood there missing train after train being so pissed from 1, trying to figure out what the hell she is talking about, 2, trying to define these words she uses, 3, scrolling back and forth reading earlier texts that lost meaning 30 seconds ago and 4, writing a text, deleting and writing it again and making sure I didnt miss a word so it makes sense. And then 5, when you do finally send, your cell phone hates you and changes words around, or omits them completely thus changing the entire text convo. Possibly making things much worse. Oh but wait, you cant do anything because you lost signal underground! I sit there and wonder how such an educated girl is so fucking stupid in the real world. A simple phone call could be used to replace countless text and convey so much more info in a much shorter time. Yet she is a brick in the ocean trying to swim with that. So much for that "edyoukaytion" she has.

Look, Im sure you can modify or relate to this story here. In a forum, people argue with their E-Penises. Trying to sound or look smarter than they are. People flip out if you use A FEW CAPITAL lettered words. (Im telling the admin on you or my eyes are bleeding) And add to that, 'mispeeled' words and people who think they are smarter than they think. Its a fucked up combo me thinks. In this day and age, with "textnology" with Swype spelling words as fast as you can say them. People have lost the art of actual F2F (Face to Face), dare I say, SPEAKING! So next you find yourself "Arguing With Text" Switch over to that contact page and dial up a real conversation! If you can that is...